Children Learn What They Live

As the parent of a young child, I often find myself wondering if I'm doing things the "right way".   I think it's easy for parents to not only compare their children & their abilities, but to also compare our parenting skills.   I often wonder, "Am I doing enough?", "Am I teaching her enough?", "Am I loving her enough?". 

I'll be honest: I would LOVE to be Super Mom. 

But, I know that I'm not. I'm simply not there yet & honestly, I don't know if I ever will be.

I was talking to my best friend today & we were discussing our children's milestones (physical, verbal, emotional, etc).  And although those types of milestones are VERY important, I realized that there is an entirely different set of things I need to be teaching my daughter on a daily basis.  Things such as kindness, patience and contentment. 

So, when I ran across this 1959 poem from Dorothy L. Nolte, I realized that in order to raise my child to become a responsible & emotionally healthy adult (as my Dad always told me was a parent's job),  I have to intentionally speak love, patience and encouragement into her life.

Although this poem is over 50 years old, it's words are as true today as they were then:

If children live with...

...criticism, they learn to condemn.

...hostility, they learn to fight.

...ridicule, they learn to be shy.

...shame, they learn to feel guilty.

...tolerance, they learn to be patient.

...encouragement, they learn confidence.

...praise, they learn to appreciate.

...fairness, they learn justice.

...security, they learn to have faith.

...approval, they learn to like themselves.

...acceptance and friendship, they learn to find love in the world.



~Dorothy L. Nolte

This poem reminded me that what we say to our children, what we show our children & how we treat our children will shape their outlook on life.  And what they learn, whether it's good or bad, is what they will do.

I understand that parents are not the only people who have influence over their children..they are bombarded from all sides with other people's idea of what's right. 

But, as my daughter's Mother, it is my responsibility to make sure my words, my actions & my expectations shine brighter than any others'.

So parents, let's strive to intentionally raise our children in secure, peaceful & encouraging homes, so one day, we'll have the pleasure of knowing they have grown to be responsible & emotionally healthy adults.