3 Ways To Be a Good Mom AND a Good Friend

{Hanging out at WDW with Crystal, the best friend a girl could ask for}

"A friend is one of the nicest things you can have

and one of the best things you can be."

Douglas Pagels 

In If You Ever Needed Friends, It's Now, Leslie Parrott says, "It is one thing to start a friendship, it is quite another to maintain it, to stay on what C.S. Lewis called  'the same secret path'- especially as a parent.  Even strong friendships require watering or they shrivel up & blow away".

There was a time, before I was a mother, that I was not such a good friend. I didn't take time to nurture  relationships, I struggled with being open and caring and since a friendship is only as strong as it's weakest participant, I was keeping my friendships with other women at arm's length. 

 

And let's face it: after the baby comes, it can be hard to find enough time to take a shower, much less nurture your friendships.  But that is exactly when it's important for us to cling to our friendships with other women. 

 

I remember when my daughter first came home-although I was excited to be home with her all day everyday, I sometimes found myself feeling lonely & overwhelmed.  Having a supportive, caring girlfriend (like Crystal) to talk it out with was exactly what I needed.  And thankfully, our friendship has grown even stronger since both becoming mothers.

Here are three of the most important qualities every mom needs to consider for maintaining her friendships:

• Forgiveness:
• Everyone is bound to deeply offend every friend at least once at some point.  And whether the offense is intentional or unintentional, the only way a relationship survives is because someone chooses to forgive.  The friends we keep the longest are the friends who forgive us the most.  And a true friend knows what traits to simply overlook.

• Loyalty:
• Loyal friends do more than offer to help when you are in need.  They also celebrate your success, believe your goals are attainable & truly want you to prosper.  It's rare to have a large number of people in your life that fit in this category; it's much easier for people (women in particular) to be envious of one's successes.

 

• Honesty:
• True friends aren't afraid to tell the truth & they definitely aren't afraid to be themselves. If you are too afraid of making enemies, you'll never have true friends. I think we all struggle with this at some point in our lives (think high school).   As Emerson said, "Better be a nettle in the side of your friend than his echo".



Remember,  two important things that every mom needs are a best friend and the belief that being a mother is one of the most important jobs available.